Tonight I asked the girls whether they preferred McDonalds or pizza for dinner. Pizza won, hands down. I phoned the order into Venice Pizza, one of Edmonds' better kept secrets. They're tucked away in this weird little shopping center a block from where I live that has dog groomers with hand lettered signs, a cool little game store with thinly stocked shelves, and numerous other instantly forgettable small businesses. But the pizza rocks, and their staff is nearly ecstatically grateful when you buy it. If you live north, screw Dominos. Support scrappy immigrants who often seem perplexed by their own cash register and are pursuing the dream.
Anyway, they were cutting the thing and boxing it up when we arrived. For a few minutes the girls were able to play with Pizza Elmo, who lives on the counter. Squeeze his hand and he sings. First Elmo, and then the pizza, who is an Italian contralto. His lips move as Elmo waves him around. "Yummy, yummy, yummy pizza pie!" sings Elmo.
As the girls went to bed, Twin B asked why the pizza sings, "Yummie, yummie, toss me in the air!" "Toss me in the sky," corrected her sister! "Why does he say 'toss me in the sky,'" pusued Twin B? "Um," I said, "It's because you toss pizza in the sky when you make it."
Always the guy with the answers.
"Wow!" said Twin B.
Below is Duckie. He is ready for bed, wearing pajamas, seated on a pillow and sporting a bracelet on his head for a crown. He measures nine inches tall and nearly ten long. Twin B nearly exploded with joy when she found him discarded on a sidewalk in front of one of the odd little stores next to the pizza joint. During bath time tonight, Ducky was the star. I was asked to not disturb him tonight as he slept.
Just before bed, the girls opted for Youtube over stories. After watching Chilly Willie in Hot and Cold Penguin for the twentieth time (the appeal fades), I said daddy got to pick the last one. I went for Tex Avery's Magical Maestro. Any serious fan has seen it. This wikipedia entry has a detailed exegesis, which includes an explanation of "the hair gag" and tells you which sections Cartoon Network edited out in the late nineties to avoid offense. The version below is original and uncut.
I suppose I shouldn't be exposing them to racist stereotypes at such a young age, but I'm pretty much already over it. There's plenty of equal opportunity ridicule here. Even the stuffy opera audience is parodied. The girls were less than impressed, and only found a few parts funny (the Polynesian segment was a big hit).
I guess there is a lot of set-up involved for a few thin jokes. But it's still brilliant, even if it couldn't, and shouldn't, happen now.