The Soldiers of God Go Underground

Last April, after coming across the Soldier of God product line in an Oriental Trading Company catalogue, I wrote a post called Kill for Jesus. Never one to take anything at face value, I was a little amazed to see little rubber duckies and teddy bears in army helmets, toy military gear emblazoned with crosses, camouflage clothing items with the Soldier of God logo, and so forth, all targeted at kids 10 and under. While these toys represent a small part of the Vacation Bible Study product line, which is in turn a small part of OTCs overall inventory, they still very much creeped me out.

Happily, I was not alone. Freelance writer Corey Habbas wrote Holy Warrior Toys Sell in America for an online publication called OpEd.com. The article quotes various faith leaders and educators expressing various levels of dismay that a market exists for such toys and that this company has filled the niche. Habbas' piece caused OTC to pull the toys from their catalogues and website. Few wins come this easily.

As it turns out, this one didn't either. Habbas has found that the company continues to sell their Soldier of God toys through their call center. The products have not come off the market. They've just gone slightly underground. A petition has been set up to ask the company to stop selling the products altogether. It takes 30 seconds to sign. For what it's worth, please do. And pass it on.

Kill for Jesus

Something creepy arrived in today's mail. The Oriental Trading Company, the largest purveyor of worthless crap in the known universe, sent me their "Fun & Faith" catalogue.

The VBS, or Vacation Bible Study, line of goods represents just a tiny portion of the 25,000 items one might purchase from this fine company.

Most of these are innocuous cheap pieces of religious paraphernalia for the seven year old of faith. "God Rocks" baseball caps. The foam Jesus Walking on Water craft kit (I kind of want one). Religious beach balls. And the karmically hilarious Smile Jesus Loves You plastic boomerangs.

But the Soldier of God product line kind of gave us the heebie-jeebies. These included cute little militaristic Soldier of God teddie bears and rubber duckies, a wide array of camouflage Soldier of God clothing items, with wrist bands, canteens, helmets and such, and, last but not least, little military stickers, tattoos, badges, and bracelets to show just whose side God is on.

I'm not one of those people who think that kids should be kept from war toys. My childhood had the normal quotient of toy guns and grenades. My GI Joe met his fiery demise in a backyard charcoal pit inside his Apollo space capsule. His flame retardant suit did not save him. And none of this stopped me from turning into the commie that I am. But all of my toys were strictly secular.

Has the recruit shortage come to this? There's something about stamping God and crucifixes all over little kiddy war toys that just doesn't sit right. God's Army is getting younger all the time.